I tried not to blog about heavy topics because this is supposed to be about my loves, I only want to record my happiness and not the complains. But I chanced upon this blog which is very relevant to my everyday worries.
http://kidsrsimple.com/2014/05/28/a-peek-into-the-after-work-hours-of-a-ftwm/
I desperately comb through the blogs, hoping to find a mum with situation similar to me and secretly hoping to have a situation worse off Then me so that I will be comforted. Unfortunately, no. I know my problems yet I could not rectify it, which makes me quite miserable.
Being FTWM, is not easy at all. While most of the readings I came across are making decisions to be Sahm, when the most important point you have to consider is financial burden. Once it's sorted out, you just have to make it work. For FTWM, you are juggling continously. Your single colleagues will never understand that when you leave office on time, you are going to do a more challenging job. You can't bring your emotions to work and you just feel like slapping the 100th person who asked you why are you so tired after a weekend. Also, the decision to be a FTWM is always easier to make, But you didn't realised that behind this decision you also must have some kind of support. Like are you going to force your parents to take care of your kids If you can't fetch them from child/student care on time? Are you going to let your kids be independent to be responsible for their own academics (do homework while mummy & daddy are still doing late night overtime). Would you hate yourself If you have neglected your child and they turn astray?
No conclusion.
I can totally agree and understand your point of view. We can never have the best of both worlds can we? Sometimes the SAHMs envy the FTWMs for the "freedom" they have during the 8 hours at work. But is that really freedom when you are slogging and working hard, sometimes without any recognition, and at the expense of not spending time with your kids.
ReplyDeleteCut yourself some slack, you are doing great!